dear adah,

i haven't forgotten that you've turned four and deserve a love letter from us. in the meantime, know that you're my every endearment, and i can't wait to spend my upcoming spring break with you. meow.

some people go to great lengths to get to tacoma faster

in the city, i often feel obliged to over-schedule in an effort to see our friends with any regularity, even though i know that the best days for us as a family are the sloooow ones. anne and i are both homebodies, but she is a total introvert, and i'm not. i get energy from being with people, so i'm the scheduler. anyway, today was busy, and three events were on the calendar-- all fun and seemingly important ones. and just for the sake of insanity, i also threw in the idea pot that if we had energy after the three events, we just might jump in the car and go see aunt liz in tacoma.

first: waffles with kristi and tyler. we don't get to see them very often, and had yet to visit the new house they bought.

second: clio's fifth birthday party. she is one of adah's favorite friends at school. it was an "in-leiu-of-a-gift-bring-a-book-to exchange" type of sweet event. it was sweet until clio realized what she had gotten herself into with the no-gift deal and pleaded with her mother to change the party to one that included presents that weren't up for trade.

third: the annual "everyone-is-italian-st. joseph's-day-parade-and-pasta-festival" at matt and kay's.

how could you say no to any one of those?

we got through event #1 smoothly. we tied a balloon to our bike for event #2, and adah faced some severe social difficulties that included yelling at some kids and sitting in my lap the whole time until it was time to eat cake. event #3 was incredibly entertaining and involved rehearsing some old italian favorites--"that's amore," "bambino," and "mambo italiano" before parading through alberta park with a huge st. joseph banner. we made quite the scene.

on the way back to matt and kay's to eat red food, adah told me she felt like she was going to throw up. i took her into the bathroom and she even did a little gaggy number towards the toilet. on the way out she asked for 5 plain noodles, which apparently is a cure for sudden barf syndrome, and we got on the bike to go home.

a few blocks later, she stopped whimpering and said to me, "now that we left early, i guess we can start packing up for tacoma sooner." so basically she pretended to be sick so we could leave for tacoma earlier. she loves that auntie liz. either that or she's developing a psychosomatic disorder.

too bad i forgot to mention to her that we weren't going since liz was still sick.

and that's why i'm eating red food from a tupperware container for dinner.

"ms. nealis needs some time off"

is what the kid told the assistant principal yesterday morning when he visited my classroom and started to laugh at my pantomimes. i've been teaching with laryngitis for the past couple of days, and my students have been such sweet and careful listeners that i may use this as a teaching tactic for awhile after i recover. especially after spring break when the eighth graders think they're graduating the week after, and there's 2.5 months of school left to go.

the whole fambly has been sick for an entire month now-- with this awful cold/intermittent fever. anne's had a double ear infection for a few weeks, and i'm on antibiotics still for the pink eye i got from opal. we're normally a pretty healthy bunch, so it's been kind of startling how sick we've been.

there's been some glorious springy days out there with teacup-sized magnolias blooming, and this particular season, although life-giving, feels a little bittersweet. i am missing a bonnie tinker somethin' fierce, and am soberly feeling the loss of her in our family, especially around bug's upcoming birthday, and all this springiness, since some traditions are seeming lost and far: like bonnie taking adah to every blooming flower field within a 100 mile radius, and showing up a couple hours late. so i find myself grieving at inopportune and surprising times, and it's all because of the fucking daffodils. i'm sorry that i'm this broken record of grief. please bear with me.

*****
on the other hand, things that are bringing me joy, in no particular order:

-imagining a bestie in puerto rico among phosphorescent dinoflagellites

-molly and matthew over at spilled milk
-open doors and windows
-peach pie yanked from the freezer
-conjuring up summer plans

and lists of places i'd like to visit
-"free" massages and chiropractic care as a result of the car accident
-painting rocks outside and barefoot saturday mornings
-planting a nectarine tree in the front yard
-finishing final grad school paper and 35 report card narratives in one week
-watching adah develop new friendships and learn how to climb trees
-a sur la table discount and my new citrus squeezer
-planning 4th birthday party celebrations
-these two books: red sings from treetops and tessa kiros' cookbook apples for jam

-annie making me laugh after a long and sick laughing haitus

-thinking about jojo and ama and zanna bringing lolo home

-korin and i pretending to audition for the portland roller derby on april 1st.

that's a whole lotta good.